Many women ask me "why is sex so pivotal in our lives anyway, I wouldn't have a problem if I never had sex again?" Hey, not having sex again is fine as long as your partner has the same interpretation. Otherwise, you'll need to work together to find a solution or it's likely to lead to disagreements and fights.
Intimacy and sex can actually help you feel more loving and closer towards your partner because of the release of hormones and neuro-chemicals. You may want to consider the physical and emotional benefits for both of you before letting go of a your sex life so easily. Think back, what happened in the life of your relationship that lead to sex becoming less important?
Lets discover together why coming out of our thinking heads and more into our natural body wisdom, together with some of the ideas may to help demystify a few of the myths surrounding healthy sexual intimacy.
Well we all know it a fact sex helps your brain release loads of endorphins, hormones and neurotransmitters (like oxytocin and serotonin) that help combat depression and make you feel happy. Sex and touch is a gateway way to sustaining the intimacy and bond between couples. Regular sex can help your partner feel loving toward you and keep the relationship strong. Without intimacy what was once a loving relationship turns into a household partnership, which for many can feel more alone than actually being alone.
Let’s start with the logical chemical explosion, sex boosts your immune system, keeping colds and flus at bay. The University Psychologists in Pennsylvania, found that the production of immune-boosting antibody immunoglobulin increased by a third after having sex once or twice a week. Making time for regular sex especially throughout and following menopause is shown to reduce the risks of 'Vaginal Atrophy' the cause of many complications for post-menopausal women.
Sex relieves stress and lowers your blood pressure. Those who engage in regular sexual activity are more relaxed and can better handle stress than those who don't according to a study by staff at the Mayo Clinic. Fact is, by not having regular sex, unhealthy relationships, blood pressure and stress rise. Sex significantly lowers your risk of heart attack and stroke in men and women. A study published in the American Journal of Cardiology found that having sex 3 times a week could actually halve the risk of heart attack or stroke.
Sex burns calories AND tones muscles. "In fitness terms, it's equivalent is going for a mile-long walk or climbing up and down two flights of stairs", says Patti Britton International Sex Coach and woman's sexual health pioneer, and you don't even need to get out of bed to do it! It helps you look younger! Research by Mayo Clinic staff found that couples who had sex 3 times a week looked 7 years younger than those who had sex less often. Other researchers say sex raises a woman's oestrogen levels, making her hair shinier and her skin more supple!
Forget the milk ladies... Sex prevents osteoporosis - Women who have sex regularly have higher testosterone levels - and higher testosterone levels mean better bone density and lower risk of osteoporosis. Well maybe not give up the milk, however be open to creating balance, after all it could be fun.
Sex boosts your self-esteem! Naomi Wolf in her book Vagina says that after sex the free flow of energy via the pelvic nerve to the brain develops a deeper connection and increased creativity in all areas of our lives.
Sex gives you more energy. You might be tired at the end of the day, but just like a brisk walk in the fresh air or a session at the gym can spark you up again, so can a quick romp in the hay!
So even if you're not in the mood, don't dismiss the idea right away. You could have more to gain than you realise!
Sex boosts our physical and emotional well-being and should be an important part of our lives. If you're suffering sexual difficulties such as a consistently low libido, painful sex or the inability to achieve orgasm seek professional help.
Changing the way we see and do sex and relationships really can change our lives. It's really not all about abandoning our bodies natural human needs to public opinion, disease and dysfunction as excuses to slow down a little, reach out, smile, love and be loved. When we live with more passion, we love with more passion...
Don't forget you can take advantage of our introductory Coaching Session for just $99 to understand the bodies natural primal responses and begin improving your relationships and energetic sexual flow. www.realfeelings.net
Philip Millroy is an Awakening Within relationship/sexuality coach & educator based on the Sunshine Coast. He is also a qualified and experienced body worker, reiki master, cuddle party facilitator and speaker/trainer.